When it comes to people and places and work, I have no trouble committing. On the contrary, the attachments I form are sometimes too strong and/or sentimental, although this has relaxed a bit as I get older. When I’m at work, I am great at meeting deadlines and managing projects and making things happen. However, when it comes to personal hobbies and projects, I can’t commit at all. I never finish anything. I have a hundred unfinished stories and drawings and ideas.

I have a painting I once attempted of me and my sister, but I stopped taking painting classes when I started a new job and had no idea how to finish it. I have an unfinished cross-stitch that was meant to be a baby blanket for my son (who is over two years old now). I have an idea for a novel…but doesn’t everyone? I have piles of half-filled notebooks, snippets of poetry, even blogs that I abruptly dropped just ’cause I wanted to do something new. I have letters I never sent, newspaper clippings I never filed, DVD boxed sets I never finished watching, scrapbooks only half-completed, piano songs partially learned.

I go through phases with everything–sometimes I’ll read a month’s worth of bestselling trade paperbacks (you know, the Dan Brown Robert Ludlum Stuart Woods type of throwaway thriller), then spend two weeks on non-fiction books (mostly politics and history) and then go straight into two months of Alexandre Dumas. After that I’ll get into young adult and teen serials for three more months and then insist on reading nothing but “Star Wars” novels for the next three weeks. And then it’s into German literature or historical fiction or poetry or something like that. I’m extremely inconsistent in that regard. But with books at least I finish them. Well, most of the time.,

I have no idea why I’m like this in my personal life. I like to think I’m just so chock full of ideas and plans that I can’t finish any of them before I get another one. I think part of it is that I get bored easily. Or maybe it’s that I get distracted–get interested in other things too easily. Another part is, of course, that I’m taking care of a two year old, but I can’t really use that as an excuse since this has been a problem my whole life, not just for the last two years. Anyway, I keep making resolutions to finish something, and perhaps one day I’ll actually do it.

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