Before I met the dreadfully charming Mr. Right*, I always wondered how I’d know when I’d met the ONE. It wasn’t so much that I thought there was only one (1) soulmate out there for me. It was more that I knew I’d be choosing someone to spend my life with (bigamy being illegal and all) and I wanted that person to be right for me. I had this immense fear that, five or ten or fifty years from my wedding day, I’d wake up and realize I’d made the worst mistake of my life and chosen the wrong one.

I remember sitting on an old davenport in a tiny cabin on the Washington coast years ago, having a tearful conversation with Mr. R about this very concerning concern. He was pretty convinced that we were IT. Yes, but how did he know? I still wasn’t sure.

Finally, he said in pure flabergastation (flabergastification? flabergastedness?) something like this:

There is no ONE. No one that exists out there in pure form, in spiritual perfection, in theoretical bliss. We make it the one every single day…in what we say to each other, in how we treat each other, in what we do together. On dog walks and in car rides, over dinners and through disagreements. So stop looking for some theoretical one out there in never-never land. And agree to make this the one, each and every day, with me.

uh…OK.

And that little no-brainer was how I knew the dreadfully charming Mr. Right was the one for me.

How did you know your guy/gal was the ONE for you?

Janna, aka Happily Even After, 35, Seattle

*Actually, I continued to wonder how I’d know I’d met the one long after I FIRST met Mr. R. See, I dated him in college (he broke my heart), I dated him 5 years later (I broke his heart), and it wasn’t until 10 years after our first tryst that we finally got our act together. But that’s a whole ‘nother post all together.

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