After almost a year break, following a disastrous relationship, I decided to get back in the game and start dating again. I never was a huge fan of dating. The whole idea has always felt a bit strange to me. Whilst a lot of people treat it as a nice opportunity of expanding their social circle (if nothing else), for me it’s more of a torture to put it mildly. I’m left in the dark by the whole concept of seating in front of a stranger, desperately trying to find things in common. I can do it as friends – no problem at all. However, as soon as the word “date” is mentioned, my mind goes blank and I do a panicky retreat. I’m more a “meet accidentally and click” kind of a person.
This time around I’ve decided to show more courage, and become more active in the dating game. ….And the result? My dating partner (or should I say victim) is a lovely, relaxed, Australian man, who is persistent and resistant enough to try and woe me…. and I’m simply horrified. I can’t really put my finger on it. I feel really relaxed in his company, he makes me laugh, the chemistry is right, he calls when he says so, he makes me breakfast in bed… yet, I’m in a complete state of panic. No idea, if it’s him, me, or my past, bad experiences. One of the co-bloggers on this side wrote how she moved countries to join her new man… I can hardly make myself pick up the phone and call my date. So… here’s my question to all of you, dear ladies….. What makes people click? Does it have something to do with age and/or experience? The more knocks you get in love, the more experiences you collect, do you become more cynical and more resistant to romance? And, on another hand- what make people fall in love? What is this moment that you suddenly know you want to be with the other person for good? What is this mysterious switch that makes you either turn up the volume, or switch it completely off? If any of you know the answer, I’m desperately looking for it…..
Kasha, 33, London
PS. For the time being I quietly hyperventilate to myself before my dates and just keep on persevering hoping the life solves this puzzle for me.